While we’d like to think the secret to a fast promotion is all about doing a good job, your relationship with your boss can make or break your career. Understanding how to handle a narcissistic boss or one who plays favorites can save your job. And perfecting the art of managing up can be the key to thriving and growing your career.
Often this boils down to knowing how to communicate effectively with your boss. Here are three tips to keep in mind:
Understand your boss’s communication style
Ever had a frustrating conversation where it seems like your boss is brushing off all your ideas? It might not be you, or even your ideas. It might be the way you’re communicating, Fast Company contributor Melody Wilding explained in her new book Managing Up: How to Get What You Need from the People in Charge. “The good news,” she wrote, “is that these disconnects usually aren’t about your competency or the quality of your ideas—they’re about different styles.”
Research has found that there are two dimensions that shape our communication and work styles: dominance and sociability. Dominance is how much control someone needs; sociability is how much someone prioritizes relationships and emotional connection. Understanding where your boss falls on these two dimensions and adjusting your style accordingly can help you communicate more effectively.
Know how to speak up when your workload is too heavy
Being a star employee comes with perks that can include more job security. However, being a star can also mean being your boss’s go-to person—and, if you’re not careful, that can mean work overload, increasing your risk of burnout.
Fast Company contributor Kim Meninger recommends pushing back if you have too much work because overextending yourself doesn’t just hurt you: It hurts your company. Instead of continuing to accept more work, Meniger recommends being clear with your boss about your tasks as well as reviewing the tradeoffs of each task.
“When responding to your manager’s requests, adopt a consulting mindset,” Meninger suggests. “Leverage your expertise to tell your manager what you think is realistic. Remember that you are the expert in your job.”
Have a strategy for delivering bad news
Life has a way of throwing curveballs at us, and sooner or later you’ll find yourself in a situation where you have to give your boss bad news or have an uncomfortable conversation with them. In this situation, Fast Company contributor Art Markman says that it’s essential to first give your boss a heads-up, own your part in the problem, avoid assigning blame, and make space to listen to your boss’s feedback. “Resist the urge to get defensive,” he says. “For one thing, your boss may very well be giving you good advice in that moment.”