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We Asked Etiquette Pros If Host Gifts Are Still a Thing and We’re So Glad We Checked

We Asked Etiquette Pros If Host Gifts Are Still a Thing and We’re So Glad We Checked



Key Points

  • You should almost always bring a small gift for your host as a token of your appreciation.
  • It’s also polite to reciprocate the invitation and offer to host a future event or evening out together.
  • If you feel a gift isn’t appropriate, a thank you card after the event is still an absolute must.

If you find yourself making the party rounds during the holiday season, it’s a good idea to plan ahead for any hosting gifts.

But is a gift always necessary? Before rushing out to stockpile a closet full of ready-to-grab candles, we checked in with etiquette expert Nick Leighton to get his take. 

Meet the Expert

Nick Leighton is an etiquette expert and co-host of the “Were You Raised By Wolves?” podcast. 

Should You Still Bring Hosts a Gift?

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ArtistGNDphotography / Getty Images


In a word, yes, you should always bring a gift to your host. 

“A small present for the host has long been a symbol of thanks for the hospitality,” Leighton explains. “It’s a gesture of appreciation, and it’s nice to do when invited to someone’s home.”

The one exception to this, of course, is if your host is adamant you shouldn’t bring a gift. But in that case, there are other ways to express your gratitude. 

“If a host says not to bring anything, then best to honor that request,” he says. “But certainly send a thank you note after the fact regardless.” 

Just as important as a gift is the acknowledgement of your friendship. Leighton says he always suggests reciprocating the invitation.

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3 Outstanding Host Gifts

If you want to go above and beyond for your hosts, consider a more thoughtful gift. Remember, thoughtful doesn’t have to mean expensive. Here are a few examples.

Nice Coffee from Your Favorite Cafe

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Carol Yepes / Getty Images


A great bottle of wine is another go-to host gift, but if you or your host doesn’t drink, that easily rules it out as an option.

Instead, think of other things you love. Consider nice coffee from your favorite local shop, says Leighton, or a beloved luxury tea.

A Travel Guidebook or Journal

Credit:

Johner Images/Getty Images


Books make wonderful host gifts, but the key is to get them something that’s personal to them. 

“[Consider] a travel guidebook for an upcoming vacation you know they’re taking,” says Leighton.

Similarly, a travel journal, monogrammed planner, or stylish book about a known hobby are all great options.

Monogrammed Tea Towels

Credit:

Karen Brodie/ Moment Open/ Getty Images


Once upon a time, a luxury candle was the go-to hosting gift. Leighton says that time is officially past. 

“Candles are pretty boring,” he says. “They’re the fruit cake of our generation, just being passed around from household to household without anyone actually using them.”

However, this doesn’t mean you should avoid giving home accessories completely. Monogrammed tea towels, says Leighton, are one great option that show you’re giving a gift with intention. 

“The key is to be thoughtful,” he says. 

3 Good Last-Minute Gifts for Hosts

If you’re down to the wire and don’t have the time to get something extremely well-planned, here are a few gifts you can get last-minute without the air of being that.

Flowers in a Vase

Credit:

izzzy71 / Getty Images


Grabbing flowers might seem like a great last-minute option, and Leighton agrees—but there’s a caveat.

“The best gifts are the ones that don’t get in the way and don’t create a burden for the host,” he says.

With this in mind, consider instead flowers in a vase or a houseplant in a pretty, ceramic pot instead of the classic plastics they might usually come in.

Luxury Chocolates or Fancy Snacks

Paris is a major destination for gourmet chocolates.
Credit: Marcaux/Photographers Choice RF/Getty Images

Food can also be a tricky last-minute host gift, as they might feel pressured to serve it during the event. So, Leighton suggests thinking inside the box.

“A box of lovely chocolates for them to enjoy the next day at their leisure? That’ll do the trick,” he says.

Other options include fancy snacks, says Leighton, such as marcona almonds or expensive crackers.

A Handwritten Thank You Note

Credit:

EUN KYOUNG JUNG / Getty Images


No one can fault you for rushing around during the holidays—we’ve all been there. But even if you’ve nabbed a last-minute invite or you forgot completely about getting a gift, you don’t have to show up empty-handed.

“A handwritten thank you note does wonders,” says Leighton.



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